How To Focus on Yourself: 7 Tips To Create Your Own Sunshine

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How To Focus On Yourself: 7 Tips To Create Your Own Sunshine

Dr. Supriya Blair

People seem to know “everything” about other peoples’ lives with the burgeoning of social media. Or do they? As you move from one social page to another, have you considered the intentions behind why someone posts content? We typically see a highlight reel of someone’s life: the cool restaurant they ate that, the picturesque sunset they witnessed in a land far away, that loyal friend that seems so happy to be around said person, etc. What does someone else’s highlight reel have anything to do with your life?

It is important to consider what you make of your own life: how you create your own sunshine.

Here are seven tips to help you create your own sunshine:

1. Only those who have joy inside can be happy for someone else

It’s important to consider the difference between joy and happiness. Joy is something within you; it is your true nature. Happiness, on the other hand, is fleeting and is tied to external circumstances/events/people. So while it is important to be happy, it is extremely important to tap into your joy. Where does joy live? Joy lives when we are fully present in the experience we understand as now. When one lives in Joy, there is a sense of trust, well-being, and alignment.

2. Know your lane. We all have a gift(s) and a purpose for being here

So, no one person can do everything, and no one person can be everything for all people. Discover what makes you come alive: where you feel pushed by a passion and pulled by a purpose. Our internal resonance system/intuition/gut is a powerful tool to trust in, as long as we have been accurately listening.

3. Observe opportunities around you

We were never designed to know the future nor relive the past. In other words, what happened yesterday is no longer and what comes next is none of our business. There is so much opportunity for creativity and expansiveness when we don’t block opportunities because of our mind’s preconceived notions or desires. 

4. Celebrate when others are authentically in their own lane 

The world is a kinder place when we work together and don’t try to imitate, downplay, or compete with someone else’s vision. Everyone’s vision or dream for their own life is different, so how does competing with someone else’s vision make practical sense? Instead, cultivating your own vision for a better future and taking steps toward that reality could serve you much better.

5. Service to others

Giving to others, without any expectations or recognition, helps twofold: it could help another work toward their own self-empowerment, and it reflects that you have something to offer. After all, how can you give something (e.g., time, love, attention, compassion) that you don’t have? The key is to give and let go. Expecting something in return can function to build up resentment if another person does not reciprocate in kind. Remember: we can only give that which we have. Some people simply don’t recognize they have far more to give than they think.

6. Take ownership of your life choices

Philosopher, Sam Keen, says, “Whoever authors your story authorizes your actions.” You are the only one responsible for every thought in your head, every feeling you experience, every action you perform, and every reaction you entertain. Anyone and anything outside of you is just doing them.

Empowerment grows when you take responsibility for each thought, word, and deed you perform. Empowerment entails making conscious choices by deliberately choosing your thoughts. Be intentional about the company you keep. Know where your attention goes and if it serves you. 

7. Embody gratitude

Gratitude begets more gratitude. Take stock in the simple things: the smell of your morning coffee, the warm socks keeping your feet warm, having running water.

Yet dig deeper: can you cultivate gratitude for having the sense of smell to notice coffee’s aroma, the sense that allows you to notice warmth, and gratitude toward Mother Nature for allowing you a space to occupy within her expansive land? Gratitude is magnetizing; be magnetizing.

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