In my experience professionally and personally, successful couples share two essential characteristics: similar values and a sense of openness.
According to motivational speaker and author, Jim Rohn, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” If this is so, then wouldn’t it be important to make sure you’re one of those people with whom you spend quality time? To understand what you’re about and what you stand for?
Imagine one person’s beautiful history – a tapestry of likes, dislikes, preferences, needs, wants, values, etc. Some of those are easier to change than others. I believe the center of each of us comprises the things that are most important to us: our values. They are at our core.
Now imagine this same person flowing alongside another person’s beautiful tapestry. Wow… two very rich, very different, and equally wonderful histories.
People have a range of values depending on their life experiences, culture, family background, etc. We can only experience so much after all.
Our openness is what allows us to take in other ideas around us and share our ins and outs with another person. I think of openness as both, the ability to give and receive without judgment. Openness allows us to listen to another person’s world as they see it and share their inner experience. Openness lives in the present, where one’s heart meets the opportunity to understand another’s.
Don’t compromise your values. Remain open. I encourage you to know who you are as a “me” before you become partnered as a “we.”